I am Dracula.

Okay, so it's been a while. Many months. Mainly cause I've mostly been posting on my shiny new lj (which is no longer particularly shiny or new).

So. News. I have an exam on Thursday. I really should study tomorrow, so I really ought to be asleep. I'm not, obvs. Oh well. It's only 39 questions, and 30 of them are multiple choice, and I only have to get a minimum of 34 correct, if I remember correctly from my earlier calculations. I suspect it'll take about an hour, and then I'll have three weeks before school starts.

Also: Birthday soon. Woot. I...am really not that excited. I stopped caring about my birthday very much sometime before I turned 13. Presents are nice though. I should get a couple Doctor Who related things from my grandparents, aunt, and possibly my friend. My Amazon Wishlist is almost entirely made up of Doctor Who stuff, so odds are any gift I get will be Doctor Who related. Plus my friends coming over, and an excuse to pig out on popcorn and watch Firefly and or Doctor Who is always good.

This is me trying to be excited.

I'm failing rather badly.

Currently have my god-sister's dog staying at my place. Name's Lucky, and he gets along with Sam quite well. Terrified of thunder, though, the both of them. And Lucky hasn't been eating much. He didn't eat at all until tonight, and then only had about half his dinner.

Speaking of my god-sister, she's going off to college in like a week. I'll miss her, but I might get to pay her a visit sometime in October, so that's...good. And stuff.

I must say, I can't wait till this exam is over with. I have a Neil Gaiman book to read, but my blasted work ethic won't let me read it without feeling guilty until the exam is done. It won't let me read anything else I was planning to, either, including Hitchhiker's Guide, my new book full of H.P. Lovecraft, Jane Austen, or Dark Projeny, or Shakespeare, or anything. (My extensive reading list is due to a summer spent studying (and avoiding studying) math, which I wouldn't have had to do if a. the educational system wasn't such an ass, or b. I hadn't missed so much school, including the exam. I was supposed to read for three months, damn it! READ! And watch the History channel, and surf the internet for info on space and crap. I did those last two, actually, and the cooking, but READING. There was supposed to be a hell of a lot more reading involved. Grr.)

Can't wait for tomorrow (well...today's, I suppose) Universe. It's about Parallel Universes!

Finally: I've been working on a novel, the premise for another novel, and some ridiculous amount of poetry. There's also a play about vampires and a book about them that are sort of on the back burner at the moment, and will likely continue to be for quite a while, what with school starting up again in 3 weeks or so. The first novel, by the way, is your standard adventure fantasy. Girl (who is disturbingly muscular and has been training for this literally since she could crawl, maybe before) and boy (who is a bit like an ambassador, really) set out to defeat warlord named Andiatne who is working on taking over the world and is really really dangerous. Along the way they're joined by another boy (who is a starving homeless kid.) The novel I'm working on the premise for is about wolf-men.

"What would you do in case of a terrorist attack?"

Oh, look, it's the forerunner to the modern equivalent of the 'buy a bomb shelter' bit. I haven't decided yet whether to laugh or be horrified if they start showing the modern equivalent of the 'hide under your desk' films in schools.

Anyway.

My mom's response to seeing these commercials/spots/things the department of homeland security put on tv? "There used to be laws against inciting to riot." My response? "Oh, there still are, but the government doesn't have to follow them. Apparently."

In other, happier news: Friday's Psych.

...Guh. That was...wow. Former lovers. Former lovers. Former lovers. That's just...sweet harp of Rassilon, that's...there are no words. Except: I <3 you, Psych writers. Also: Shawn. Was wearing. Lassie's shirt. That's...Oh! I know! The words for this episode are:
Subtext: Ur doing it wrong.
Fanservice: Ur doing it right.

Seriously, I've watched this episode about 25 times. At least. And I've made about ten wallpapers today. Most of them were shassie, but there were also a couple revolving specifically around Lassiter's trenchcoat.

And in other, entirely different news:
Twilight rant! If you actually like Twilight, feel free to stop reading now. Or not. Whatever. And please take note that I have only read the first five and a half chapters or so. And that I loathe Bella with a deep and abiding passion. Or I would, if i found her interesting enough to loathe with a deep and abiding passion.

Right, so Edward's just spent the first four chapters telling Bella, "I'm dangerous," "it's dangerous for you to be around me," "it's dangerous for us to be friends," "danger, Will Robinson, danger," and finally, fifth chapter, he says "what if I'm not a superhero, what if I'm actually a bad guy?" and what does Bella say? Or think, or internally monolouge, or narrate, or whatever you want to call it? "He was dangerous. That's what he had been trying to tell me." No duh. I mean, she was already annoying me with all her talk of how cryptic Edward was being, mostly due to the fact that he wasn't being particularly cryptic. Also: WTF is up with everyone admiring Bella? I mean, she goes over to sit with Edward, and then Edward's all "I think they're mad at me for stealing you." Why are they mad about it? She doesn't contribute anything to the conversation! In fact, the only times she actually has a conversation with somebody who isn't Edward, it seems to be to show how distracted she is by Edward. Failing that, it's her complaining about how these two boys asked her out! Oh, and what's with Edward being all scary and 'what if I don't give you back'? Does she not realize that this is bad?

Okay, rant done.

I want it to be Friday now. Failing that, I'll take Tuesday. Which is...tomorrow, so...yay. Inaugaration! \o/

And, in conclusion, I offer this:

Apparently, there was a line that got deleted from Lassie Did a Bad, Bad Thing. A line that would have made it even slashier. According to the writers (see the commentary for the episode on the usa network site, near the end) there was originally a line right after 'former lovers' in which Shawn made it very clear that it was Lassie who pursued him, not the other way around. Unfortunately, it got cut, though one of the writers really wanted it to stay in. Sweet random object of Rassilon, I really hope that guy stays on for season four. Even excluding the slash, this episode was amazing. And classic!vision! Woot! \o/

The RIdiculously Long Post About the Master

My mom is trying to put together a table of all the Doctor's companions. She's asked me to help her, since I know more about Doctor Who than she does and can help her to figure out who counts as a companion. The table now has a column marked 'status', with options of 'companion', 'one-off', and 'recurring character', because I insisted that the members of UNIT are not companions, but rather recurring characters, and that Dr. Grace Holloway from the movie is a one-off, as is Astrid.

Anyway, after I helped her with this she showed me her table of Doctors, which is much more straight-forward. I asked if she had a table of Masters, and she said no, but agreed that this was a good idea. So now I have to help her with that, as she has no idea what information to include or who played any of the Masters. She's going to include such information as the name of the actor, any alias the Master takes, and which episodes the Master was in. I said I'd make a list of the actor names, aliases, and episodes each Master is in tonight, as I woke up at five this afternoon and therefore have no chance of getting to sleep before about four in the morning.

First of all, I've got to say, IMDBs list of Masters is...questionable. I mean it's very good, and very thorough, but there are a couple of things I noticed that bug me. Firstly, the Master in the Mind Robber is listed as being the same character as the Master in... every other episode with the Master in it, which I'm pretty sure he isn't. Also, the Master isn't listed in the Keeper of Traken credits. Just Melkur. Now, due to the fact that it takes the Doctor a ridiculously long time to actually realize that he's the Master, this is understandable. And I can't really complain, since Keeper of Traken is on the Master's character page. As I said, the list is very thorough and very good. I'm just ridiculously...obsessive compulsive, I guess, about this stuff.

And so I present: my list of the Masters, their aliases, and their episodes. First, a table with each Master's actor.

Masters:

0.5 (The War Chief)	Edward Brayshaw
1	Roger Delgado
2 (Crispy!Master 1)	Peter Pratt
2 (Crispy!Master 2)	Geoffrey Beevers
3	Anthony Ainley
4 (Movie!Master)	Eric Roberts
5 (Yana!Master)	Derek Jacobi
6 (Saxon!Master)	John Simm
Child!Master (brief appearance in SoD)	William Hughes

A note on that: First, I included the War Chief, even though it's never stated that he's the Master, and as I'm pretty sure the Master hadn't been invented yet there's no reason the writers would have wanted him to be the Master. I've always thought of him as the Master, and he'll be included on the table (I actually made my mother create a column for 'confirmed' just so I could make it clear that he wasn't canonically the Master).

And now a list of the Masters and their episodes. Sweet Rasillon, this post is really long. Anyway. I've put the aliases in parentheses next to the episodes. Some of them are a bit tentative, and I may update this later with slightly more accurate information. If anyone can make some of these a bit clearer, please tell me.

The War Chief:

• The War Games (the War Chief)

Delgado!Master:

• Terror of the Autons

• The Mind of Evil (some guy that the people at the prison listen to. I think. That or he used hypnosis on them, I'm not actually sure.)

• The Claws of Axos

• Colony in Space (Adjudicator)

• The Daemons (Satanist Leader Guy. Possibly a vicar?)

• The Sea Devils

• The Time Monster (a science professor)

• Frontier in Space (colony leader)

Crispy Master 1:

• The Deadly Assassin

Crispy Master 2:

• The Keeper of Traken (Melkur)

Ainley!Master:

• Logopolis (While not technically an alias, the Master does steal Nyssa's father's body. He also pretends briefly that he is her father.)

• Castrovalva (the Portreve)

• Time-Flight (Kalid)

• The King's Demons

• The Five Doctors

• Planet of Fire

Movie!Master:

• Doctor Who: The Movie (I think he briefly pretends he's the guy who's body he stole. It should be noted, also, that at this point the Master's body snatching is bordering on kleptomania.)

Yana!Master:

• Utopia (Professor Yana)

Saxon!Master:

• Utopia

• The Sound of Drums (Harold Saxon, P.M.)

• Last of the Time Lords

Child!Master:

• The Sound of Drums

In Which There Is Entirely Too Much Analysis of Dalek Upgrades

So I recently watched Remembrance of the Daleks, which is awesome because of the nitro nine. And the dalek getting blown up by the nitro nine. And Ace hitting the dalek with her awesome bat. Anyway. One of the daleks follows the Doctor and Ace up the stairs in the school basement, which implies that it's already had the same upgrade as the dalek in Dalek, the one that allows them to levitate and not be stopped by stairs. However, the dalek in Remembrance of the Daleks uses a slightly different mechanism to levitate than the dalek in Dalek. It's base glows, for one, and it goes up the stars in a sort of slanted path, as though it were actually climbing them. Now I'm not sure, but I think the dalek in Dalek goes straight up along a vertical line, then takes a horizantal path towards Rose and Adam and the soldier or whatever who is accompanying them. Now, what this actually, in reality, which I tend to ignore but here feel the need to acknowledge, implies that the two episodes were made a couple of decades apart. And now I go back to ignoring reality in order to say that this implies the two upgrades were made seperately. Possibly that after the upgrade given to the daleks in Remembrance of the Daleks they upgraded the upgrade so that it was more, er, upgrade-ey.

Now, I think it is probable that during the Time War, the daleks were upgraded so as to be in top fighting condition. Or something. So it's not entirely unlikely that the levitation mechanism would have gotten an upgrade, but the problem I'm having here is this: There doesn't appear to be any noticable difference between how well the two levitation mechanisms work. There's no noticable difference in speed or anything. This should mean that it had some effect on the power used. Or something. Either that, or the upgrade was not the result of the Time War, but rather some other unknown event. For unknown reasons.

In conclusion, I have no life and have spent entirely too much time thinking about this.

And now, in the actual conclusion to the post, rather than the conclusion to the ramble thing above, a comment on something from somewhere in the Logopolis commentary:

Yes, when in crisis you should always put on your scarf. It's only slightly less important than your towel.

I was watching the commentary on Logopolis, and Tom Baker was talking about how he always played the Doctor as sort of mystified by girls and kind of...asexual? I think that's what he's saying. Unless I'm completely misunderstanding what he's saying, but it's fairly straightforward so I don't think I am. Or, actually he said he played the Doctor as mystified by girls with a sort of affection sort of thing but nothing sexual. There really should have been more commas in that, shouldn't there? Oh well. Anyway, I find the fact that Tom Baker played the Doctor as asexual (although I suppose you could interpret that as 'incredibly not straight', but somehow I don't think that's what he meant) amusing, because I have adopted the fanon that Time Lords' necks are sensitive/eroginous zones. This fanon originally caused me to think thinky thoughts about why the fourth Doctor felt to need to cover his neck so incredibly thouroughly. More thouroughly than any of the other Doctors. So I was wondering, "Is he just incredibly sexually repressed, or really conservative for a liberal rebel, or what?". I mean, I'm betting that most of the Classic Who actors played the Doctor as pretty asexual, but Tom Baker actually saying it amuses me.

The thread that I adopted this fanon from was this: http://community.livejournal.com/best_enemies/65083.html?thread=646203#t646203

It's very interesting. If you're me. Or find this sort of thing interesting. Or whatever.
It's entirely possible that I spend far too much time thinking about alien sexuality. Or not. Whatever.

And Tom Baker's just said that some people thought of him as some sort of modern messiah. I find this amusing for several reasons. One, the whole 'the Doctor is portrayed as a messianic figure' complaint I remember from LotTL, and second, I found a fic in which the Doctor actually is the messiah. I'm not sure which is more amusing: that fic or the two I've seen in the Harry Potter fandom.

No! The Arm Chair Shall Eat You!

No! Don't do it! The inflatable arm chair will eat you! DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Terror of the Autons. Delgado!Master just said "...to assist in the destruction of humanity" totally straight-faced. And sort of cheerful. Yay for the ego-maniacal Time Lord murderer of awesomeness. He is awesome and hypnotizes folk. Also, you've got to love a guy who will say "I'll kill you, Doctor!" one second, and the next is all "Doctor! You're hurt! I MUST SAVE YOU!" or "Doctor, help me with my science project," or "Doctor, rule the galaxy with me." Really, Master, the Doctor might be more inclined to rule the galaxy with you if you didn't threaten to kill him every time you see him.

Is it weird that I think the troll doll thing in Terror of the Autons is adorable? Also, I've been trying to imagine what a TARDIS would look like when not disguised as something else. Like if the outside was the right size for the inside, I mean. Also what the TARDISes on Gallifrey look like. Trying to picture a TARDIS that is the size of it's inside is kind of fun, because after a second my mind decides that it's too big and sprawling and really not ship shaped. But seriously, I really want to know what they look like while they're on Gallifrey. I mean, do they disguise themselves as something from the environment just like they do anywhere else, or what?

Also, I just realized how incredibly appropriate it is that I'm watching Terror of the Autons, since I was planning on watching Rose later tonight. I've worked out how long I can last doing one NuWho story per week, and I figure I can go at least a year, especially if I include Torchwood and SJA. I'm planning on doing this to cut down on my withdrawel, as I have no idea when Scifi will air the specials and even less idea when they will air SJA. Or even if they will air it, actually, which annoys me. So I actually took the time to make a Dr. Who 2009 calendar, though I've so far only done the scheduling for January. I'm going to try and start the February scheduling tonight.

Oh, and I found Twin Dilemma! It was on a tape marked Logopolis. I'm thinking I'll watch Caves of the Androzani and Twin Dilemma tomorrow. Am I the only person who is really annoyed by Peri? I think it's partly her accent. Also her whining. She just bugs me. A lot. It's possible that Caves of the Androzani and Twin Dilemma are not the best examples of her character. Still, having watched part of both of these episodes, I'm can't really blame the Doctor for trying to strangle her. I can blame him for that coat, though. I'm just not inclined to, because I find the desicion to wear what I have dubbed "The Coat of Clashing Colors" an admirable one.

Glee! Extreme Glee!

I would like to apologize in advance for the truly terrible grammar this post will likely contain due to excessive squeeage.

I just got my Hannukah present from my grandparents, which I figured would be a Doctor Who dvd. It wasn't.

It was six Doctor Who dvds. One third Doctor, three fifth Doctors, and two seventh Doctors.

• Carnival of Monsters
• The Visitation
• Earthshock
• The Caves of Androzani
• Remembrance of the Daleks
• The Curse of Fenric

The only ones from this list that I've seen are Remembrance of the Daleks and The Curse of Fenric. Glee! I can't wait to see them, and I can't wait to watch Ace on something that isn't an old vhs tape.

I'm currently watching the Three Doctors. After that I had planned to try and find Mind of Evil, but I reckon I'll put that off until sometime tomorrow and watch my dvds. Glee! Excessive glee!

Also, the sentence "It's not helping having the Doctor bickering like a pair of schoolboys." amuses me. I was trying to figure out where the plurals would go in this sentence, and I find this result amusing.

Also, there's a possibility I broke my grandma's ears. I sort of squeeled "thank you" really loudly into the phone a bunch of times, while jumping up and down. I also somehow managed to knock the phone's base off the end table.